One of the many things I love about my relationship with Carrie is that we are able to express the things that a lot of couples suppress. That doesn't mean we're letting our raging ids take control, but if one of us is having a negative thought, we can put it out there. If you preface it with "I know this is unfair, but..." or "I'm having an irrational reaction to this" then it helps alleviate the blame factor. It's not "I'm feeling this way and you caused it" but rather "I need you to know that I'm feeling this bad thing and it's not your fault but I'd like to talk it out". We still have conflicts (especially when we don't express those things and let them fester instead), but they never last that long and at the end of it we understand ourselves and each other better, strengthening our love.