Author Topic: I just need to whimper  (Read 193888 times)

St. Martin the Bald

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Re: I just need to whimper
« Reply #2090 on: October 17, 2018, 07:02:59 PM »
That’s too bad. Maybe you can stay above the fray.

Yep, that’s absolutely my goal.
Told them both, I will not be picking sides or assigning blame.
I will hold space and allow them to be heard.

Sorry to hear that. Must be quite the blowout if they decided to split 52 years later.

It’s been rocky for a minute but - yes - unspoken resentment will eventually will be heard.
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oldkid

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Re: I just need to whimper
« Reply #2091 on: October 18, 2018, 09:17:29 PM »
Wow.  My parents are 53 years married.  I cannot imagine.
"It's not art unless it has the potential to be a disaster." Bansky

jdc

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Re: I just need to whimper
« Reply #2092 on: October 18, 2018, 09:48:45 PM »
My parents are around 55 years now (give or take). It would be a strange thought to me if they were to separate at this point in life.  I don't think I could get it out of my head how long they must have stayed together when they should have separated when much younger.

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Sandy

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Re: I just need to whimper
« Reply #2093 on: October 18, 2018, 10:23:19 PM »
Sorry for your stressful situation St. Martin.

smirnoff

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Re: I just need to whimper
« Reply #2094 on: October 18, 2018, 10:36:38 PM »
That would stress me out for sure because I know how much each of them depend on the other for particular things. Over so many years certain things just kind of fall to one person or the other to manage.

St. Martin the Bald

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Re: I just need to whimper
« Reply #2095 on: October 19, 2018, 01:51:18 AM »
Thanks for hearing me guys.
It’s been challenging for sure.
It definitely heightens the importance of communication within a relationship for sure.
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Beavermoose

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Re: I just need to whimper
« Reply #2096 on: October 21, 2018, 12:28:23 AM »
Sorry to hear about this Martin.
My parents got divorced 3 years ago after 30 years of marriage. My dad just left saying he was unhappy.
They were both pretty bad communicators, Dad didn't know how to talk about his feelings and Mum didn't know how to listen.
I would advise against forcing yourself to be a peace keeper if it at the expense of your own mental well-being.
As the oldest child I ended up taking on a lot of the family's emotional load. It was incredibly stressful seeing my Mum emotionally devastated and incredibly frustrating trying to get my Dad to explain his decision to me. He never really did.

Fast forward three years in, I genuinely think it was for the best. They are both happier and more fulfilled than they were when they were together. They are not on the best speaking terms but there is definitely less resentment. Time will make it easier.


1SO

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Re: I just need to whimper
« Reply #2097 on: September 14, 2019, 10:37:28 PM »
What is happening to our home? It's so much more empty than I realized (or wanted to acknowledge.) I went through the last 100 posts and it gave me hope that it comes up to 21 people. I'm just now realizing how much less pixote is posting with just 1 so far this month and 6 for all of August.

FLYmeatwad

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Re: I just need to whimper
« Reply #2098 on: September 14, 2019, 11:22:12 PM »
What is happening to our home? It's so much more empty than I realized (or wanted to acknowledge.) I went through the last 100 posts and it gave me hope that it comes up to 21 people. I'm just now realizing how much less pixote is posting with just 1 so far this month and 6 for all of August.

This is still the best website on the whole internet.

1SO

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Re: I just need to whimper
« Reply #2099 on: September 15, 2019, 12:49:17 PM »
This is still the best website on the whole internet.
This remains true and these are the best Boards and sub-boards for film discussion. It's just the empty halls and ghosts of the past are depressing me.